Ellen in Paraguay

My sister said she thinks I am crazy for writing about how I was worried about adjusting back to North American culture, since I lived in it for 23 years, and it cannot even be compared to the shock I felt coming here. But honestly I think I have spent more time worrying about going home than I did about preparing to come here. Ben said it will probably only get worse as the time draws near and he gave me a book to read called “re-entry” to help missionaries make a better transition going back home, even if they have only been gone a year or so like I have. It is basically one big metaphor about space travel. I liked the story about Sergei Krikalev, a Soviet cosmonaut. Well, he left as a Soviet, and while he was in space the Soviet Union broke apart. He orbited the earth in the Mir space station for 10 months, double the planned length of his mission, because people had more important things to worry about than him. When a replacement finally came, he returned as a citizen of Russia, and the name of his hometown Leningrad had been changed to St. Petersburg. Plus his leg muscles had atrophied to the point of not being able to walk after so much time in a zero gravity environment. Granted, I have been living at a fairly low-altitude (80% of Paraguay is less than 300m above sea level), but I think my red blood cell count will be able to adjust fairly quickly to Alberta. I am more worried about things like leaving my very simple life style, and wondering if I will ever see my friends from here again. I remember when I went to Bible college in the middle of Saskatchewan, the most deserted place on earth as far as I’m concerned. I literally got sick at the sight of all the big shopping centers driving into to the city after being away for just four months. I have never gone hungry here by any means, but I can see myself being overwhelmed by food when I get back. Do you have any idea how special it seems to me to have ice cream in the freezer any time you want it? Or a microwave? Thankfully, I assume I will easily be able to adjust to not having to wake up at 5:30!

Anyways, enough of my complaints. The book on re-entry says that lots of times returning missionaries get depressed because they don’t get a big welcome back and they don’t have a strong support group like they had on their mission. Plus, where they were foreigners and special among the people they worked with, at home they are just like everyone else. The great thing is that I know I will have a great welcome home and lots of people who will be interested in hearing my experiences and looking at pictures, right? My church and my family and my friends always made me feel special even before I left. I am such a lucky girl. I decided that instead of worrying so much about leaving I am just going to enjoy my time here, and take advantage of the fact that people here want to make me feel special before I leave. Yesterday at Karen’s house we had a big “family” meal, I guess of which I am included, and it was so noisy that it felt just like Christmas, and we stayed all day long just being together. Then when we were walking to take the bus home, Rey and I passed by Pastor Pedro’s house, and were invited in for a second snack! I remember one of Ed’s sermons in which he talked about a book called “Bowling Alone” and how a major problem in North American society is that so many people spend so much time alone, even to the point of going out to eat or going bowling alone. It would be difficult to have this problem in Paraguay. When I come home everyone needs to make sure to invite me over a lot so I don’t get sad, or else I will just show up clapping at your gate like they do here.

# posted by Ellen @ 4:49 PM